Naive
by Diabolical Bowler Hat
Summary: Is it naïve to hope for a way out where none exists? Felicity thinks so, Dig just thinks it's denial, but they both hope it doesn't mean the end. An episode tag for episode 1x22 'Darkness on the Edge of Town'.


-Naïve-

It was ironic, Felicity thought, that the man who had unwittingly dragged her and Diggle into his world, was the only one who thought he could leave. Both she and Diggle had long since come to the realisation that they couldn't leave; that the world Oliver had brought them into was now an irrevocable part of their lives… But suddenly Oliver thought he could just stop being the Hood? That he could stop the Undertaking, save the city and just be done?

Felicity knew, apparently better than Oliver did, that that simply wasn't possible.

The Hood had become such an intrinsic part of him there was no way that Oliver could just stop. His old life wouldn't be enough for him and the memory of Laurel, that he had clung to for 5 years on that island, wouldn't match up to reality. And she could say that because Felicity knew that her old life would no longer be enough for her… and she hadn't spent the last 5 years stranded on an island fighting to survive, learning Russian and Mandarin and practicing archery, as well as who knew what else. So if Felicity, who was just the IT girl, knew that she couldn't go back, how could Oliver not see that the same was true for himself? He was different now and even if he stopped being the Hood, the island would always be a part of him that he couldn't repress.

Perhaps it was understandable, she thought; it was the memory of Laurel Lance, gorgeous Laurel, brave Laurel, confident in a way that Felicity could never be Laurel, that had saved Oliver from insanity on the island and it was Laurel that a part of Oliver so desperately wanted to go back to. The problem was that the part of Oliver that wanted to go back to Laurel was the old Oliver, the innocent, naïve, playboy, billionaire, pre-island Oliver, and Felicity wasn't sure how much of that Oliver was really left. Sure she'd seen glimpses of him, the odd smile or laugh here and there, but post-island Oliver, the one who was fierce, serious, scarred and damaged, was the Oliver she knew and the one that Laurel didn't.

Maybe it was because she hadn't known him before the island that she saw Oliver for who he really was, she knew that Diggle noticed as well, that the Oliver that had come back from the island was about 30% old Oliver, and 70% serious-depressed-damaged-Hood-wearing-vigilante Oliver. That was ok though, to be expected even if half of what Felicity suspected had happened on that island had actually happened. Her suspicions were only worsened after spending several hours hacking anything and everything that could give her some information on the island (she would never ask Oliver directly, so what else was a hacker with insatiable curiosity supposed to do?) So Felicity knew that Oliver was different now. She didn't mind though, in fact, if she were being honest with herself, she liked- ok loved- the new Oliver, what worried her though, was that Laurel wouldn't.

She knew that Laurel was a good person and it wasn't that Felicity was jealous of Laurel either, she'd always been realistic about the fact that her feelings for Oliver would remain unrequited, after all she knew that she was not the girl that the guy fell in love with, she was the friend in the romantic comedy, she was the companion to his Doctor, the one who inevitably fell for someone she could never have, but she worried that once Laurel discovered that the Oliver that Felicity loved wasn't the same pre-island Oliver that Laurel loved, Laurel wouldn't be able to cope.

After all, isn't that exactly what had happened with Tommy? His knowledge of what Oliver had become since his time on the island had destroyed a friendship that spanned right back to kindergarten. Felicity didn't want to see that happen to Oliver again. She knew the break-up of his friendship with Tommy had hurt him more that he'd let on. So she worried that breaking up with the love of his life could destroy him, could send him spiralling into himself and he would get lost in the painful memories of his time on the island; the 5 years that had changed him and had ripped him from his old life and supplanted him in his new one.

But Felicity could do nothing to stop him. It certainly wasn't her place to say anything and if she did say something it would only result in him invading her personal space to growl at her and her trying to steady herself at having him so close and so far all at once.

She was drawn out of her reverie by a cough and it was at that point Felicity realised she'd been staring at a blank computer screen for the last ten –or maybe even 15- minutes. She prayed to God that it wasn't Oliver who had now come to stand right behind her… how would she explain this to him without rambling and accidently saying something like "getting back together with Laurel is a bad idea, like colossally bad, like Paris and Helen of Troy bad, like Chakotay and Seven of Nine bad" she couldn't, her stupid rambling habit would expose her, she knew it.

"Felicity?"

The call of her name interrupted her thoughts for the second time – huh- so apparently she rambled in her head too.

She turned around slowly and couldn't help but sigh with relief when she saw the concerned face of John Diggle staring back at her somewhat curiously. She quickly scanned the arrow-cave (the name she had given the Verdant basement in her head) and noticed that Oliver was no-where to be seen.

"Are you alright Felicity?" Diggle asked cautiously, pulling a spare chair to sit down next to her.

"Yeah. Yes. Of course, I mean why wouldn't I be, right? It's not like this is my only job, I mean I can go back to just working at Queen Consolidated once we're done… I mean sure I'll miss you, I'll miss the work we've been doing, I'll miss Oliver… I mean I'll miss lecturing Oliver about arrowing people and trying to keep him a little bit human… but I can go back to my old life, I love computers I've always loved computers-"

"-Felicity" John interrupted, taking pity on Felicity and stopping her mid-ramble. "It's ok, I understand, I'll miss this too." He said quietly, knowing that despite the problems he'd had working with Oliver; never spending quite enough time with Carly and trying to knock some sense into the arrogant and sometimes stupid vigilante… Well, he'd miss having a sense of purpose in his life; a purpose that had been lacking since he'd left the Army and joined private security.

"How can he not know Dig?" She asked, forgetting that Diggle had not been privy to her internal monologue earlier.

"Know what Felicity?"

"That he can't quit. That this…" She waived her hand around the arrow-cave "…this is his him now, that this is 'us' now."

"He knows Felicity, he does. I just think for the next few hours he needs to let himself be naïve. After finding out his Mother and his best friend's Dad are planning to level the Glades and kill thousands of people, I think he needs a few hours of the 'old' Oliver, of the Oliver who didn't wear a Hood and didn't run around cleaning up his father's mess."

"I know – but Dig?"

"Yeah, Felicity?"

"He's not the old Oliver anymore."


End file.
